THE BRAVELY BALANCED BLOG
For the overachiever and the overworked!
How exhausted are you? I know the feeling!
Does being exhausted serve you? What if I told you that you could have it all without subjecting yourself to hustle culture?
Sounds divine, doesn’t it? Follow along and feel the ease!
Category
- Agency
- Analysis Paralysis
- Anger and Depression
- Anxiety Stress & Fear
- Balance
- Burning the candle
- Burnout
- Change
- Dealing with Urgency
- Difficult Choices
- Doubt
- Drive
- Emotional awareness
- Empowerment
- Empowerment and Living
- Epigenetics
- Expectation
- Faith
- Healing
- Hope
- Inspiration
- Introversion
- Leadership
- Overcoming emotional pain
- Personal Boundaries
- Personal Strengths
- Resilience
- Self-reliance
- Shame
- Trauma
- Victim Mentality
- Vulnerability
- Worry
- avoiding conflict
- balance
- being alone
- conflict resolution
- connection
- decluttering
- duty and guilt
- emotional eating
- emotional pain
- empathy
- energy
- feeling stuck
- gossip
- happiness
- imposter syndrome
- intentions
- justice
Why Not Now?
Work is hard to find for many of us these days – costs are up and businesses aren’t hiring. The thing about harder times like these is that it can get you considering options you would never look at otherwise. And some of those options, if you’re like me, are ones I dream about but am too comfortable to try. I can get myself into a nice cozy lull with little effort: get up, have coffee, get dressed, get to working on things I am very familiar with, have dinner, get ready for bed, redo next day.
Then something happens that upturns all that comfort. …
The Problem of ‘Just Talking’ About Others
The destructive nature of gossip came up once more last week in my close circle, so I thought it would be a good thing to talk about because I’m pretty sure it’s an issue belonging to most social circles.
Yes, I’ve heard ad infinitum how we are all social animals and that gossip isn’t necessarily bad. But think for a minute – what you are gossiping about is someone else’s to say. It isn’t about something you read or heard on the news, but something not given for public consumption about someone else.
Gossip is always about something privately obtained that belongs to someone else …
Hope, Magic and the Future of Our Work
These are tough times for us all, and especially for the self-employed. Like many self-employed people, over the past half year, the methods you relied on to successfully market yourself has begun to fail. What now? You’ve probably tried many alternatives: new marketing platforms, free material, podcasts, interviews, social media, workshops, talks. You’re busy exploring all these ways and so far, nothing’s happened.
I’m not here to tell you I have the answer to this new problem so many of us have. What I do want to talk about though is hope and magic. …
Bad Choices Rarely Happen By Accident
I was browsing the internet the other day looking for hair product. I didn’t have an urgent need for it, but was distracting myself from a task I needed to do and didn’t really want to do. Eventually I saw something that caught my eye – or more likely eased my dissatisfaction – and bought it. That “product” turned out to be a scam. …
You Have More Agency Than You Think
A lot of women I speak with feel they lack agency in their work life especially. I know about this issue because I’ve also felt it. I feel it when I am working with someone who is forceful and wants to control everything.
But even when this happens …
The Growth We Miss When We Avoid Conflict
Lots of people in my world are conflict-averse. That includes friends, colleagues and clients. And myself … often.
People dedicated to avoiding conflict will go to immense lengths to sidestep any possible conflict that looks like it might happen. They might verbally agree with someone even if they don’t agree on anything that person said. They might …
Honesty, Humility And The Right Choice
Rahm Emanuel – Chief of Staff during President Obama’s first term - admitted to the mistake the core executive made of letting the bankers off the hook who were central to the housing crash during that time. In an interview, he said if he could do that over again, he’d “slap them”. The decision of President Obama’s to let those bankers off the hook while many ordinary people suffered generated a long-lasting resentment and a sense of betrayal, and led to the formation of the Tea Party. The Tea Party was the foundation of the MAGA movement.
What he said was, to me – the right answer. …
Reframing Rejection – The Quiet Strength Of Vulnerability
I’ve been thinking about the meaning of pain lately, especially emotional pain. The other day, I had asked for something, and was told that if I wanted this, I would need to do something I felt was demeaning. I felt the pain of embarrassment and rejection.
It was a relatively small thing, and yet it hurt, …
The Power of an Inspiring Beginning
How do you begin your day? With a coffee? With family? With meditation? Or a walk?
I begin my day …
Courage To Be Me
This is a story of someone dear to me who, because he decided not to allow fear of what others might think influence him, was able to shine in his chosen field. I know him personally, and have witnessed the changes he had to make for this to happen. It wasn’t easy for him.
As with so many people, he grew up in a family that was kind, but pretty authoritarian: …
What A Cabin Weekend Taught Me About Priorities
I’m going to direct you to a blog Seth Godin wrote a few days ago. In it he discusses all the ways guests at your dinner party might have different food and entertainment priorities than you do. He talks in terms of empathy on your part.
The message I got from this is different. …
When It’s Finally Time To Let Go
“Your emotional pain won’t last forever – but it will wait forever.” This quote from Anita Phillips gave me a chuckle. Not because it wasn’t true, but because it’s very true. That doesn’t stop anyone from testing it out, though. Me included! …
The Myth Of Fairness And What We Can Do Instead
I was reminded a few days ago about justice: how much I rely on it; how much many rely on it. Like so many others, my beginning years were difficult. I felt I had to work harder than others to achieve my goals. I sometimes lacked the kind of support that could have helped me avoid many of the mistakes I made.
I often felt hard done by …
Responsibility As A Superpower
I had booked a rental car at the airport of a city I was in for a workshop. After waiting in line for 2 hours, I was told that my drivers’ license was out of date (my birthday happened a week earlier) and they couldn’t rent me anything. Not something I’d anticipated, since I’d had to renew that license for different reasons a year ago. It meant paying for a taxi to my destination, then Lyft-ing back and forth to my workshop until I could get a temporary renewal and a different rental car.
That was expensive and time-consuming. And tiring. …
The Stillpoint Within: A Simple Practice for Calm and Stability
I’m an anxious person, and I work with anxious people. One very powerful skill for an anxious person, or for anyone dealing with any kind of stress, is to find their inner stillpoint.
There’s an exercize I learned along the way a number of years ago. I no longer recall from where, but it is very useful as a way to find and maintain that stillpoint we all have inside us.
Here’s the exercise: …
What If This Is What I Chose?
I don’t know about your life, but in mine, things aren’t going the way I’d like. I want better health than I am experiencing. I want a listing system I’ve relied on for years as a therapist to work again. I want the political climate to be, once again, something I can be proud of.
I want things to be as they were a few short years ago – …
The Freedom Of Focusing On What’s Right In Front Of You
I was listening to a podcast the other day while I was doom-scrolling (yes, I am reduced to doom scrolling, but mostly manage to limit my time doing that). The interviewee (whose name escapes me) suggested that moving towards a goal is futile. For him, as soon as he achieved the goal, he felt less than satisfied. Instead, he suggested a switch in perspective. He suggested a better focus is to do the next right thing, whatever that thing happens to be. That way, he argued, you are always following what is meaningful to you in the moment. …
Mad at the World: Owning Our Anger Without Letting It Own Us
One thing I hear from many people is their anger. It gets expressed in a lot of ways – blaming others, demanding perfection from others, demanding perfection from themselves. It’s rarely expressed directly, so when it is so expressed, I take notice. Last week, a friend, after complaining about the supposed imperfection of someone he just met, suddenly said: In truth, I am just mad at the world!
Well, I am too. …
Why Decisions Need Daylight
I was speaking with a friend the other day about choices: she had a decision to make that was difficult, not only because it was momentous but also because it was emotional. She wanted to talk it over with her friends so that whatever decision she ended up making would be something she could live with.
I’ve done that and always appreciated the clarity I received from simply bringing it to the light of day. I’ve also not done that, making decisions based solely on my own thought processes. Sometimes these ended up being good decisions. Sometimes they led to circumstances I deeply regretted. …