The Myth Of Fairness And What We Can Do Instead

I was reminded a few days ago about justice: how much I rely on it; how much many rely on it. Like so many others, my beginning years were difficult. I felt I had to work harder than others to achieve my goals. I sometimes lacked the kind of support that could have helped me avoid many of the mistakes I made.

I often felt hard done by and was very focused on justice – for myself and others.

Then at some point I realized that this uber focus of mine on justice never really helped me or anyone else. In fact, my actions on its behalf often backfired, only making things worse.

I’m not at all knocking the idea of justice. Nor am I in any way against the kinds of institutions we have that support rule of law. What I have come to appreciate is that the justice received from living in societies where the law is honoured and administered doesn’t cover a great deal, and it never will.

Getting a coveted job or having a shot at a great career depends a lot on who you know and who your parents and relatives are these days. Getting into the right university depends on being able to pass exams, which in turn depend on getting help preparing for those exams; and that requires money and knowhow. Yes, there are scholarships, and that sometimes helps, but not often. Even though diversity issues have been addressed, this too can cause injustice in other ways. In fact, it seems that the more we as a society attempt to correct for injustice, the harder things become.

I was reminded that Orson Wells (and many others) said “Nobody gets justice. People only get good luck or bad luck”. Well, that is true in a society where there really is equal opportunity. But that isn’t today’s society. Anywhere.

What that means to me is this: the best we can do is to live the best we can live, working with what life presents us, good or bad. It is true that being as prepared and open as we can means that when good luck comes our way, we can use it and not squander it.

Quote of the Week

To expect life to treat you good is foolish as hoping a bull won't hit you because you are a vegetarian.

- Roseanne Barr

Overcoming rejection, when people hurt you and life isn’t fair

Announcements

Maryanne Nicholls is a Registered Psychotherapist.  To find out more, gain access to her weekly newsletter, meditations and programs, sign up at www.thejoyofliving.co . 

If you’re interested in the topic of avoiding burnout for people who do too much, you may be interested in checking out my youtube channel.